[Write On!]

Search Write On!

Character Descriptions

by janra
Posted to Craft, Characterisation on Mon Jan 07, 2002 at 05:37:13 PM PST
[Print]

How often have you read a story and rolled your eyes as the author lists off hair colour and length, eye colour, height, girth, clothing style and colour...

But you still want your readers to have a good idea of what the character looks like, so you have to provide some physical description.


It's also often stated that there needs to be a reason for describing the character, because most people don't just randomly take stock of how they look. A very common (and in my opinion not very good) method is to have the character catch sight of him/herself in a mirror. Of course, if the character in question is very vain and that is part of the story, then the mirror trick would work, and would be appropriate.

My personal preference is to have a real reason for describing the character - and not a contrived situation, either. It makes it more difficult, to be sure, but it also makes it feel less like a description dump done 'just because.' But when you have finally gotten a situation where the description fits natually, how much should you put in? You could fill pages describing your character. A good rule of thumb I've heard is: no more than three items at a time.

When two people see each other for the first time in the story, choose three items that describe the character well. (I've been known to stretch it to four on occasion, but I try to keep it to two or three.) By varying your choice of attributes and the terms used to describe them, you can describe not only the person you are directly describing, but also can indirectly describe the observer.

Consider the following two paragraphs. Both are describing the same person, a lady who has just stepped up to a microphone at a conference.

1:

The MC stepped back from the microphone and smiled at the lady he had just introduced. She smiled back a little nervously, but her step was confident as she approached the podium. She tapped her notes on the podium to straighten them, her brown hair swinging forward to obscure her face as she glanced at them. "Thank you," she said, looking at the crowd as it slowly reclaimed its seats. Her hands gripped the back edge of the podium, and her left heel lifted out of her dress shoes as she shifted her weight to her right foot.

2:

The MC stepped back from the microphone as the lady he had just introduced walked across the stage, her long dress swishing with each step. She tapped her notes on the podium, and tilted her head down to address the microphone. "Thank you," she said, her rich voice carrying to every corner of the stadium.

In the first example, the three items were her nervousness, her brown hair, and her fancy outfit (implied by her dress shoes) as seen by the MC (the fact that he could see how she was standing behind the podium was a giveaway). In the second, they were her long dress, her height (implied by her leaning down to the microphone) and her voice as seen by somebody in the audience.

Hopefully you found that the amount of description was enough to get an idea of how she looks, but was not overbearing. A few pages later, when appropriate, another two or three items could be introduced - perhaps her eyes or her smile when she is shaking hands afterwards.

What do you notice first about a speaker who has just stepped up to the microphone? What does your significant other notice first? What does someone you know with different tastes, skills, or hobbies than you notice first? What do you notice first about yourself when you're the one stepping up to the microphone? How are they different, and what does that tell you about you?

Login
Make a new account
Username:
Password:
Poll
When an attractive person walks onto the stage, the first thing I notice is his/her:
  • hair 16%
  • face 50%
  • chest 9%
  • waist 1%
  • hips/bum 3%
  • legs 1%
  • shoes 0%
  • clothing 9%
  • voice 3%
  • other (comment) 3%

    Votes: 216
    Results | Other Polls
    Related Links
    Display: Sort:
    Character Descriptions | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden)
    character descriptions (none/0) (#1)
    by Jaroslav on Mon Jan 07, 2002 at 06:01:36 PM PST
    </P>
    Good article. Thanks for posting it. I was glad to read it, to find out someone has got something to say on this topic, on characterization.
    </P>
    I was confused myself at first. I didn't know how much to write about a character. Should I write a paragraph, a line, a page, a book, a whole encyclopedia britanica? I mean, there is no end. What are the parameters of a character description?
    </P>
    But thanks to you, I now know. Three things and that's it. Roughly speaking, of course. But nevertheless, a hard number, three. I like that. I am into statistics myself. My philosophy is - if you can't quantify it, it's bad. And if not bad, at least not good. A good description is with three items you say. Yes?
    </P>
    When I was reading your article, dear, I was thinking of Chekhov. He was very good in character descriptions. He always made seemingly superfluous descriptions, which always turned out to be enriching - in some mystical way.
    </P>
    I wish I knew how to write like Chekhov. But hey, maybe I will someday - who knows? Now with your little advice perhaps I can reach new hights in my writing. Oh, it's a clever tip.
    </P>
    By the way, I sensed a spirit of sensousness in your style. Do you enjoy giving alot of attention to detail?


    'rule of thumb' vs. 'rule' (none/0) (#2)
    by janra on Mon Jan 07, 2002 at 10:24:06 PM PST

    But thanks to you, I now know. Three things and that's it. Roughly speaking, of course. But nevertheless, a hard number, three.

    No, a rule of thumb is not a hard answer. A rule of thumb means 'start here and adjust to fit.' A good rule of thumb rarely needs much adjusting, but the option is still there and that is why it is a 'rule of thumb' and not a 'rule.' I personally find that, for the purposes of introducing a character, three details fits very well with little adjusting. You might find that four fits better, and that's fine. You might even find that ten fits your style better; I may not agree, but then writing style is a personal thing.

    It also varies with the situation; my WIP starts with a deluge of description - but then the opening scene is a child 'playing pretend' with all the detail of her imaginary world actively in her attention. When most people talk to someone they know already, they don't usually have the looks of the person they're talking to foremost in their minds; the point I was trying to make in this article is that choosing what a person notices about another tells a lot about the person doing the watching - the '3 items' rule of thumb was incidental.


    --
    Who needs to be big and burly when you can just apply physics?
    [ Parent ]
    Descriptions and all (none/0) (#3)
    by Jaroslav on Wed Jan 09, 2002 at 05:51:25 PM PST
    As far as descriptions communicating something about the observer, this is only true if the observer is not an omniscient one. Otherwise, if the observer is omniscient, the observer knows how everyone looks from every side, dear.

    Also, as far as picking material for description, I think (I just got the idea) that points of description can be compared to hash keys. I mean it. You see, friend, our brains, have a faculty called memory, which works in a weird fashion, such that by thinking of a hash-key idea your memory recalls a whole network of information.

    They say that to memorize a bit of information it is useful to imagine an image that is somehow related to the data you want to memorize. And the more memorable, colorful and remarkable an image the easier it will be, in the future, to recall the bit of info that it connects with.

    So, I'm thinking, now, do character descriptions serve this job of a hash-key for our memories, helping us to remember the characters we read about? (Afterall, reading is learning, isn't it?)

    Accordingly, it is logical to conclude that the points we want to describe are the points that make the character somehow outstanding, remarkable, different, unusual, strange, or even silly.

    In any case, points of description are points of contrast relative to other characters. Like, if both Jane and Jill satin dresses, I don't want to describe them in the same way - I'll make sure to describe those aspects of the dress that are distinct, unless, of course, I want to communicate a sense of lacking individuality, like, let's say, in an army, where everyone wears the same type of clothing, where everyone is equaly as bald shaven as the next guy, and where everyone, pretty much, listens to orders.

    [ Parent ]
    point of view (none/0) (#4)
    by Dolohov on Sun Jan 27, 2002 at 05:08:58 PM PST
    I think that as long as the descriptions do not violate point of view, then you're safe. Now, that's far easier to deal with in 1st person or limited 3rd person than it is in omniscient 3rd.

    The trick is in knowing what the viewpoint character would notice. A short person, for instance, would perhaps obsess on height. A vain person might go on and on about faults, while a jigolo might notice and internally comment on everything striking. Thus, in this case, the rule you gave would perhaps be restrictive.

    Also, I would not like to consciously apply that rule, lest my readers pick up on it! I think that it is a far more valuable rule when I am editing than when I am writing.

    Mirrors (:o)|(o:) (none/0) (#5)
    by Enkeliina on Thu Dec 18, 2003 at 04:23:22 PM PST
    A favorite author of mine is C.J. Cherryh.  Wandering around on her website I found her "advice for budding authors" list.  Most importantly the glaringly obvious mistakes, or literary devices that make her cringe.  Mirror effects made the list - like nails on blackboard make the "most painful noises" list.  Her belief was that it should only be used once in an author's lifetime, if that.  This includes window reflections, still waters and even eyes.

    And since I haven't yet published, the following advice is suspect:  think real life.  Think back to past first meetings with people.  What are your first impressions, second, and third?  And how you noticed them.  
    Words and Time my life's Obsessions.

    ick, mirror scenes (none/0) (#6)
    by janra on Fri Dec 19, 2003 at 06:18:05 AM PST
    Honestly, it's pretty rare that using a mirror to describe somebody is appropriate. I can remember offhand only once that it didn't make me cringe... in Anne McCaffrey's Dragonflight (the main character happens to see a decent mirror for the first time in her adult life right after bathing, and she uses it so she can see what she's doing while trying to tame her hair).

    If it fits the story, then it can be used in moderation, but it so rarely fits the story... and really, even if you're writing a scene where the character is brushing her hair in front of a mirror, she's probably paying more attention to watching the knots in her hair than her eye colour ;-)
    --
    Who needs to be big and burly when you can just apply physics?
    [ Parent ]

    Character Descriptions | 6 comments (6 topical, 0 hidden)
    Display: Sort: