Diaries || What's on your mind?

In which I pause to ponder the writing process once again.

my weblog (http://darthbeth.tripod.com/myblog) is acting stupid.  That's all I have to say today.  I am peeved.  Grrr.  
Okay, I lied.  Why not post something from a month or so ago?  Here 'tis:

"Maybe I'm just not a writer.  Maybe I never was.  Who knows.  Maybe I've wasted my entire life on dreams that are way out of my reach.  Typing isn't easy for some reason.  I don't know what to say.  There goes Chester.  Wonder what's on his mind.  Man, everything seems to lean towards another idea, but nothing good comes to me.  What's the deal?  How do I break this cycle?  Should I just give up writing all together?  It would seem like the thing to do, considering I suck at it.  I wonder how they type so fast in the movies.  It's like they all took professional typing courses or something, making no errors or anything.  Who knows."

Wow, that was a bummer day.

Noise stunts and stimulates my creativity.  For example: listening to certain types of music (I like Enya when I'm writing fantasy and heavy rock when I'm writing a scene full of anger) affect how I write.  For example, Kelly Clarkson is on the radio right now.  But if I turn on the U2 CD, my style might or might not change drastically . . .at least my mood will.  
I think rhythm gets into our skin.  Notice at the fair when the band is playing on the stage.  Notice all of the people walking in time.  They look pretty dorky, don't they?  Well, chances are you're walking to the same beat.  Choose your music to suit what mood you're writing (can yuo tell that U2 is on right now? Love Veritgo).  I think that's an article in Reader's Digest.  Maybe my style doesn't really noticeably change, but my mood sure does.  Feeling's got to come out somehow, so if you're writing, that's where it's going to happen.

I'm just rambling.'

Good night.

Bethywoo  

...And St. Crawford came unto him, and did say, "Broadcasteth word of thy wares, my son, for we are privileged to live at the root of an information tree whose branches shall one day emcompass all history."

"But how?" cried CheeseburgerBrown, falling to his knees. "I don't even have enough money in my PayPal account to buy the cheapest ad on K5!"

"Use the Scoop, my son. Let go thy conscious self, and act on instinct."

CheeseburgerBrown nodded. "I shall cast my spams unto the Scooposphere, like little turds left floating in a public lavatory. Thank you, St. Crawford!"

St. Crawford smiled beatifically as he ascended on high by wings made of AdSense. "Remember thy keywords," he called as he was swallowed by a veil of cloud. "Save thou, they can."

CheeseburgerBrown waved and then, when he thought nobody was looking, farted.

INSIDE: Ten compelling reasons to start reading Simon of Space right now!

I was driving along a gravel road in a dirty pickup, left elbow out the window, wearing boots, jeans, and a work shirt, singing along to a country station on the radio. Suddenly, I thought - good lord I feel like such a hick!

Then I laughed and kept singing.

well men arnt hard to figure out when they love you like they love you Ilike girls when they want to go be alone to talk to you so that you can find some thing you loveabout them . I think that love is like a good kiss Its new  but sweet from the right one kiss kiss kiss.

It's 3AM. I'm hanging around in the MCC (where the computer is) because I'm giving the filters one of their twice daily backflushes, a job which takes a lot of babysitting and is conveniently close to the computer. On filter #5 (of 6) I notice a reddish glow coming from underneath the north door.

I open it on a whim - it is 3AM, I might see a sunrise.

It's been a while. More musings, mainly to myself, on what I'm doing wrong.

I mentioned earlier that I had been programming the PLC (programmable logic controller) for the plant I'm working at. Just thought I'd go into a bit more detail, because I'm finding it a big change from the type of programming I had done before - which was mostly slinging text around with perl. (Scoop mostly, but sometimes other things too.)

I know I've mentioned that I'm up north for my new job, but I don't think I've said exactly what it is I do here.

The answer is, when things are going well I do SFA, when they're not I scramble to fix them. Kind of like a sysadmin, only with a chemical plant instead of a computer network.